Crazy Amsterdam

A special thanks goes out to Steve C. for bringing this one back from Amsterdam for me. I’ve censored the image of the can slightly for obvious reasons… I’d like to keep the rating of this site as universal as possible. The label on the can didn’t give the caffeine strength of the product but I’ve been informed by the manufacturer that it is 32mg/100ml. A note about the manufacturer actually – Protaste Drinks produce a generic energy drink in a shiny silver can over which retailers and promoters can apply their own label. I’m assuming ‘Crazy Amsterdam’ is an attempt at cashing in on Amsterdam tourism by doing just this.

As for the flavour, well, it tastes like plastic. Very syrupy and synthetic tasting with a lingering aftertaste that I can’t recommend. This drink is all about the label and should be considered as more of a souvenir than a taste sensation.

Monster Energy

A nice big can and a pleasant sweet flavour. This is Monster Energy’s flagship drink featuring in addition to the caffeine and taurine ingredients such as L-Carnitine and Ginseng. Wikipedia tells me L-Carnitine is an antioxidant as well as being used as part of the treatment routine for angina sufferers and kidney disease patients. Hmm, it does also allegedly improve sperm quality though… Monster Energy is one of my favourites and has a very distinct flavour easily placing itself apart from the crowded Red Bull clone market. The trademark ‘M’ logo will be familiar to many as it emblazons many sponsored sports events – keep your eyes open for the many different Monster varieties which all have a unique flavour.

Red Bull

What kind of energy drink review site would be complete without a review of Red Bull itself? Not the original but certainly the most widely known and available product, it is my favourite and most people’s first experience of an energy drink. Based on Asian tonic drinks and created by a clever Austrian, it’s now a worldwide phenomenon. Most people are familiar with the ‘Red Bull Gives You Wings’ cartoon adverts, or will have heard of the Red Bull F1 team. It’s everywhere you look…

It’s a very sweet carbonated drink that grabs you at the back of the throat. Some say it is an acquired taste, which would make most Red Bull clones an even more acquired taste, but I loved it from the first drop. You can get it everywhere pretty much so you’ll never be far from a can if you need one.

Mixxed Up – Sugar Free

Lidl’s low calorie version of their “Classic” variety tastes almost the same. The difference is due to the sweeteners and gives you that chewy aftertaste, but of course as with any sugar-free variation you miss out on the associated sugar rush and crash. I quite like avoiding that but I know many people don’t, but it’s good to know that there isn’t much of a flavour difference otherwise. Due to its price and lack of sugar, this is the drink that I stock up with in bulk in my garage.

Mixxed Up Classic

Lidl’s own-brand Red Bull clone with a very slight sour undertone. Mixxed Up is probably at the top of my list for own-brand energy drinks. It’s very palatable and very cheap at only 29p per can (at time of writing). It gives a moderate kick and has no nasty lingering aftertaste like so many other cheap drinks do. It’s usually available in-store on promotion if you buy 6 cans, and the staff don’t bat an eye if you pick up an entire shrink-wrapped tray of 24 cans and take it to the checkout. There’s also a sugar-free version which I can highly recommend, and the classic loses out only slightly to its lower calorie sibling.

Relentless – Origin

Imagine Red Bull, but slightly more bitter tasting. It’s in a double-size can and just as strong so you do get quite a kick from it, but I can’t get past the bitter aftertaste making it a good choice if there’s nothing else available. If it is sitting on a shelf next to a can of Monster, I’d personally go for Monster.

Cougar Lifestyle Shot – Berry

I am most definitely not the target audience for this particular energy drink, but given that it exists I had to give it a try. Cougar lifestyle shots, for women; advising on the bottle to provide “Age Defying Energy” are aimed at, shall we say, the older lady who… actually I’m going to let The Urban Dictionary handle this one.

After drinking this I can’t (or won’t?) say that I suddenly found myself eying up younger men, but I did get the rush of energy expectedly provided by these drinks. The caffeine hit comes from the usual added caffeine and more unusually green tea extract. In fact, if you check out the product’s web site and look through the ingredients, you’ll see a whole host of natural additions which are aimed at women (you drink Aloe Vera?? Apparently so.) . The flavour was very nice. The bottle says Berry, but I’d say it was the same flavour as the cherry powder in a Double-Dip (remember them?). I know it’s not aimed at me but it tasted great, gave me the wanted caffeine hit, it is very different to Red Bull and has zero calories.

Energy Burst

I found this one in Pound Stretchers, and no, it was less than a pound. Coming in a 500ml bottle only and containing pretty much the same ingredients and caffeine strength as Red Bull, it tasted exactly as I expected it to taste. It’s just another Red Bull clone – quite pleasant and sweet but nothing special. I can’t really think of much to say about it really suffice to say that it does the job! Probably would have tasted better from a can as I personally think that every drink tastes better that way..

Power Up

After all the effort expended in the search for new energy drinks abroad, I find this in my local shop. This drink is helpfully summarised on the can: “Liquid Strength, Power Up, Extra Strong, Original Formula, Feel the Energy, Enjoy it Icecold [sic]”.

Given that it’s only 35p, I consider this to be a bargain.The flavour is very different to Red Bull with a flavour that should be sour but is very sweet – I’m sure I’ve tasted this flavour in another drink before but I can’t place it. The ingredients are the standard energy drink affair: caffeine, taurine and sugars so nothing to stand it apart from the crowd.

The “Extra Strong” slogan is misleading to say the least. The caffeine content is 30mg/100ml which is lower than Red Bull and most premium energy drinks, but the same as most bargain basement ones. Now, Power Up Products in Manchester, do you do a sugar-free version?